Guest Post by: Chris Morris
I am so excited to have Chris Morris here today as a guest…He is currently writing a book about living with chronic illness and his writing/story-telling is an inspiration, and motivation for many…make sure and show him some love in the comments as well as go visit his site…you will not be disappointed…
Next week I will start back with the regular workings of Careless in the Care of God and we will be discussing Boundaries, how to recognize when your boundaries are being crossed, how to set boundaries with those in your life, and how to enforce the boundaries that you set…
We are 40% funded for “Ch a nge in Perspecti ve” bags…click here to se e h ow you can h elp give hope, and permission to dream for the future to patients receiving chemotherapy…the campaign is open until Nov 24th…
“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?” – Jesus
It all sounds so neat, prim, and proper when Jesus tells us not to worry about our lives. That He’s got us covered. Since we matter more to our heavenly Father than the birds who are always provided for, surely He will take care of us.
The struggles, the sorrow, and the pain are all in the details, though.
Details like my autistic epileptic daughter who was suspended the first week at her new school for spitting and cursing at a teacher. My daughter, who really does have a tender heart, just found the challenge of a new school too much.
Details like the absent seizure I had several weeks ago that jarred my surgically repaired shoulder when I fell to the floor. Sometimes, being tall isn’t as awesome as you might imagine. Seventy-nine inches is a long way to fall.
Details like my vibrant, brilliant healthy twelve-year-old son having two seizures in a month’s time, and having to start on seizure medication himself. Even though he’s the healthy one. This detail is still fresh and painful for our family.
It’s pretty easy to lose heart and lose hope in the details. Honestly, it’s easier on some days not to remind myself of promises like this one from Jesus. His promise just doesn’t seem to connect with my reality. Seemingly broken promises bring up uncomfortable questions
Is it my fault that my body and my kids’ bodies are so broken?
Has God been distracted by some greater emergency?
Has my Daddy in heaven forgotten to take care of the Morris Clan?
Have I shut down the pipeline of blessing with some bad choices?
On and on the questions go. Stirring up doubt, guilt, fear, shame, frustration, anger, and irritation with God.
If you hook up the hummingbird, why not ME?
Why is this life of blessing so hard, so frustrating, so difficult!
I’ve learned it’s okay to have these accusatory scream sessions with God. It’s actually this type of honesty He longs for, where I throw the full force of my pain at Him. Crying, pleading, begging for healing, for hope, for change.
So far, God hasn’t answered by “fixing” my daughter’s autism, or stopping my seizures, or miraculously removing the pain in my shoulder every time I raise my arm.
But He has reminded me that He is faithful. Through my anger, He reminds me of the blessings in my life.
I see the love my wife has for me—mess that I am—and gratitude stirs in my heart. There is no explanation but God’s grace to explain that we are not only still married, but more in love than when we said, “I do” in January 1998.
I wrestle with all three of my kids (who try not to destroy my shoulder) and I’m struck with more than elbows; I am struck with joy. Most days, our kids get along with us and each other. We know how to laugh, how to play, and how to love God and each other well.
I ride the bus to work, and realize it’s a miracle I have not been unemployed a single day of my marriage, coming up on sixteen years. Even through disability and my daughter’s hospitalizations and surgeries, I have always worked for men who value me enough to keep me around.
If I choose to see it, I am surrounded by the favor of God.
His provision for our family right now doesn’t look like bodies that don’t seize or minds that function perfectly or shoulders that don’t hurt. Instead, it looks like love, gratitude, joy, laughter, stability, and purpose.
Which is exactly what He promised in the first place – a life worth more than food and clothes.
Chris Morris loves telling stories to inspire and encourage others, even when life seems busted.
He is a CPA by day, but a creative at heart.
He also loves a great cup of coffee, preferably French press.
You can read more of what Chris writes at Chris Morris Strategies and Encouragement for the Climb …